Change is Good!

This weekend I was trying to finish up another of Christy Tomlinson's workshops, She Art 2 and created this canvas.  The Living Canvas workshop started today and we were to think about our lives up to this point.  Our story.  All of the circumstances and experiences that have made us who we are at this point in time.  I have had a blessed life, free of tragedy and really hard times but I have made some really bad decisions that still have led me to a great place.  I am truly, truly blessed right now but God has convicted me to change and to continue to strive to be better.  This workshop is helping me to drive in the right direction.

Sometimes we resist change.  I have always been FOR change, openly and with great enthusiasm.  This time is not different but I am nervous and anxious about failing.  Will I be able to manage the discipline needed to feed my family in a healthy way and change their way of eating? Will I be able to save money and resist temptation for the things I don't NEED but want?  Will I take time to be present as a mother and spend quality time with each of my girls?

The answer to those questions is yes.  With God's help, yes.  The Bible says we must die to ourselves daily to be a proper servant of the Lord.  If God wants me to be better, which I know He does, then I must embrace change.

The butterfly symbolizes change.  This butterfly started out kind of ugly but I worked and worked on it adding layers and layers of color and texture to create something I think is beautiful.  It takes work to change and be what God wants us to be and it isn't always what we want to be but it is necessary to follow His will in our lives.  God chose me to be the mother of two beautiful girls and I am making a change so that I can do a better job, for them and for Him. 

 I really am a selfish person.  I think inside we all are to some extent.  I marvel at the people that seem to NEVER think of themselves and always put others first and I see for the most part how happy those people are.  Don't misunderstand, I know there needs to be time carved out for me but the people I am talking about literally and instinctively think of others before themselves.  I am working on that one. A Lot!

I understand the need for change.  The need to have a healthy family, the need to have more financial security and the need to be a mother my girls can come to, for and about anything.  I understand, I'm just not real sure yet how to do it.  I am learning and working and thank goodness He is not finished with me yet.

Blessings,

Jana